A Successfully Stress-free Week of Single Parenting

When my boys were much younger, not really so long ago, I used to dread when my husband would have to leave town on a business trip. He does help out around the house and with the kids a lot, not to mention the fact that I generally like having him around to talk to. I knew his trips were necessary but I whined about them none the less.

One of the things we discussed in our Love and Respect marriage class recently was how much it bothers him when I give him a hard time about business travel. It undercuts a man’s need to feel appreciated for the work he does as provider. So I resolved to use my words and tone carefully when he left town last Monday for seven days on a trip to his favorite plant in Pennsylvania with a fun stop in State College for a meet-up with his blog community and a few days being spoiled at his parents’ house.

One of my tools for shaping this resolve was prayer, specifically praying that the Lord would help mold my attitude in such a way that I was not only not resentful that Mike was gone, but that I would really get a chance to enjoy the solo time with my kids. Every morning in the shower I would pray this same prayer and start the day with a smile on my face. Even after Alex started throwing up in the middle of the night on Thursday and I didn’t get to sleep till after 3am. It had to be God’s work in me that kept me from even being cranky about the whole ordeal. Thankfully he was healthy as a horse the next morning.

The boys and I had a lot of fun this weekend. Friday night I attended our church’s Ladies Banquet since they had childcare and I was really blessed by it. Saturday we headed over to the Katy Folk Life Festival where lots of activities and displays from pioneer days were set up. Alex got to try working a spinning wheel and both boys pet a snake and a baby alligator. Their favorite part by far was the farmyard where they were free to run around with chickens, roosters and turkeys.

Friday night we had dinner with my grandparents at Olive Garden, which went well enough that we stayed for dessert. They rarely last that long and I usually need a second parent with me to keep them occupied and in line.

Unfortunately my iPhone up and quit on me Saturday night, so after a long morning at church we headed first to the Verizon store and then to the Apple store. The guy at the Verizon store wouldn’t even look at it, which was infinitely frustrating especially when the guy at the Apple store fixed it in 30 seconds without even taking it apart.

But I will say the Apple store was an experience I don’t want to repeat…it was a zoo and when I walked in a guy at the door flipped out on my kids for gently touching a window display that he was guarding with his life because it was apparently falling apart. I saw him lecture many other adults about it too, my kids weren’t doing anything inappropriate. Then he insisted I needed a Genius bar appointment for more than an hour later, so I hate to waste time at the mall. I have been avoiding malls like the plague because of exactly what happened to me when I just walked through Macy’s on the way to the Apple store. I was overcome by the awesomeness of the shoes and clothing I passed. Not kidding y’all…I must be in shopping withdrawal or something because I wanted one of everything I saw.

Anyway I showed up for my appointment and had to wait around in the chaos of people till they called me. It appeared to be useless red tape as I saw several folks just step up to the counter and get helped right away.

My boys were awesome though, so well behaved. So little whining and complaining over this past week that I really did enjoy the time wasted at the mall watching ice skaters and getting  pretzels. I did get frustrated with my youngest pooping in his underwear all week, but I know potty training won’t last forever. I didn’t mind putting them both to bed every night. There wasn’t a single tantrum that lasted more than about 30 seconds…and that was all God’s work, in my opinion.

How do you handle things with your spouse is traveling? Any practical tips or creative ideas you can share?

Lead Me

I needed to share a song and a prayer that are on my heart today.

A prayer for wives. (source)

Heavenly Father, you have called me to honor and serve my husband in grace, humility and love, and yet so often I let worry, insecurity and fear overshadow that calling. Unburden my heart from worry and expectations. Teach me to relinquish control of my life and marriage to you, for only you are strong enough to carry and sustain it.

Lead me to a place of deep trust and intimacy with you, so that I would seek no emotional fulfillment elsewhere, but would bring to my relationship with my husband a rich overflow of confidence and strength, making of our home and marriage a peaceful, restful haven. Show me how best to love my husband, supporting and respecting him, praying for and trusting the work of your Spirit in his heart and life.

Give me the wisdom to value what is eternal, so that I might be truly content with my present circumstances, and not fretful or anxious over family decisions and finances. Teach me to be beautiful as you define beauty. Let me be a creative and enjoyable friend and companion for my husband, gracious and kind, gentle in disagreement and quick to forgive.

Only as you lead me will I become the woman and wife that my husband needs. So lead me, oh Lord. Amen